MARCH 10, 2009

rehabcenter

Well, after rapid cash payday loans Tippy was transported to the Shattered Dreams Rehab Clinic and inducted into their long term, intensive care program, we thought things would calm down here in The Hinch. But a little over a week later, Tippy broke out of Shattered Dreams all hell broke loose. She went on the run, she made it all the way over to the other side of Lake PO-KA-HO, she was later apprehended, and was being interrogated by the B.H.M.P. while awaiting return to Shattered Dreams. But now the question that has everyone buzzing is……………What was she doing with a reporter from the Weekly World News?

BREAKING NEWS FROM THE BAL HINCH………TIPPY GOMEZ GOES A.O.L. FROM SHATTERED DREAMS REHAB

SOMETIME EARLY MONDAY MORNING, BAL HINCH ENTERTAINMENT REPORTER TIPPY GOMEZ WALKED AWAY FROM SHATTERED DREAMS RECOVERY CLINIC AND WAS MISSING FOR OVER 24hrs UNTIL BEING same day loans today APPREHENDED JUST SHORTLY AFTER NOON TODAY.
ALMOST A MONTH INTO HER COURT ORDERED REHAB STINT AT SHATTERED DREAMS RECOVERY CLINIC AFTER BEING FOUND WANDERING HALF NAKED AND INCOHERENT ALONG RATTLESNAKE CREEK ON FAT TUESDAY MORNING LAST MONTH, MS. GOMEZ JUST WALKED AWAY FROM THE CLINIC GROUNDS SOMETIME BEFORE BREAKFAST ON MONDAY.
HEAD PHYSICIAN BIFF GURNEY, WAS RELIEVED TO HEAR THAT LOCAL AUTHORITIES HAD APPREHENDED MS. GOMEZ AND THAT SHE WOULD SOON BE TRANSPORTED BACK TO THE CLINIC SOMETIME THIS EVENING. DR. GURNEY RESPONDED BY SAYING THAT HE RELIVED AND HAPPY TO HEAR OF THIS AFTERNOONS EVENTS, “WE HAVE HAD HER ON A PRETTY STRICT DIET OF ANTABUSE, ZOLOFT AND XANAX SINCE SHES BEEN ADMITTED, SO I DIDNT THINK SHE WOULD GET TOO FAR. sunny loans bad credit IM GLAD TO SEE HER SAFELY APPREHENDED AND WE WILL REINTRODUCE HER BACK INTO THE PROGRAM SOMETIME TOMORROW. QUITE FRANKLY, I THINK SHE HAS BEEN MAKING GREAT PROGRESS. SHE STILL WONT GO ANYWHERE NEAR THE CAFETERIA WHEN WE’RE SERVING TURKEY MANHATTANS, BUT WE ARE HELPING HER WORK THRU THAT AND ARE HOPING TO SEE PROGRESS SOON.
SHE WAS FOUND SHORTLY AFTER NOON TODAY, ABOUT 6 MILES AWAY AT BUZZEEZZ BAIT AND BAR-B-Q OUT ON STATE ROAD 714 ON THE WEST SIDE OF LAKE PO-KA-HO. WAITRESS, GLORYA HOLECUM SAID SHE SAW HER WALK IN AROUND NOON WITH THE LUNCH CROWD REGULARS AND SIT BY HERSELF AT THE BACK OF THE DINER IN A BOOTH. “I DIDNT REALLY SEE ANYTHING OUT OF THE ORDINARY GLORYA SAID, BUT loans for self employed people with bad credit WHEN I WENT TO FRESHEN HER COFFEE, SHE WAS CONSTANTLY MUMBLING SOMETHING. I THOUGHT SHE WAS WEARING ONE OF THOSE BLUETOOTH THINGS, BUT THEN I REALIZED SHE WAS TALKING TO HER CUP OF COFFEE, SO I TOLD MY BOSS’.
SINDEE JIZZINSKI, ASSISTANT MANAGER AT BUZZEEZZ RECOGNIZED HER RIGHT AWAY FROM PICTURES LAST MONTH IN THE LOCAL PAPER AND IMIDIATLEY CONTACTED THE BAL HINCH SHERIFFS DEPARTMENT. “I HAD HEARD ABOUT THE DUST UP DOWN AT THE LOUNGE LAST MONTH BUT REALLY HADNT HEARD MUCH SINCE. BUZZEE GOT INTO IT WITH JOHNNY LOVEDART OVER A SAUCE RECIPE A FEW YEARS AGO AND THERES BEEN A FUED EVER SINCE. WE PRETTY MUCH MIND OUR OWN BUSINESS ON THIS SIDE OF THE BAL HINCH AND LEAVE THEM TO THIERS”.
BEFORE OFFICERS personal loan pdc COULD APPREHEND MS. GOMEZ AN UNIDENTIFIED MAN WEARING A PLAID LEISURE SUIT WAS SEEN CONVERSING WITH HER, BUT HURRIEDLY LEFT JUST AS DEPUTIES ARRIVED. AN UNIDENTIFIED PATRON AT THE NEXT TABLE SAID HE SAW HER LOOK THE MAN DEAD IN THE EYE AND SAY “DONT FORGET WHAT I TOLD YOU ABOUT THE STUFFING”.
DEPUTIES WERE ABLE TO GET THE MANS LICENSE PLATE NUMBER FROM THE DINERS SECURITY CAMERA AND DISCOVERED HIS VEHICLE WAS REGISTERED TO THE GLOBE WEEKLY TABLOID MAGAZINE.
MS. GOMEZ IS NOW BEING HELD FOR QUESTIONING AT THE BAL HINCH SHERIFFS DEPARTMENT AND WILL BE TRANSPORTED BACK TO SHATTERED DREAMS SOMETIME LATER THIS EVENING.
WE HERE AT THE LOVEDART LOUNGE ARE PLEASED TO HEAR OF THIS OUTCOME AND WISH MS. GOMEZ A LONG AND SAFE RECOVERY.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>